I’m not flirting. I’m just being extra friendly to someone who is extra attractive.

I know.

It can be hard to distinguish between friendly and flirting behavior.

Getting the wrong signal can be pretty awkward, crushing, and/or heartbreaking.

Flirting can vary widely depending on cultural norms, personal style, and the context of the interaction.

“No word is absolutely wrong or dirty or insulting. It all depends upon context and intention.” — Janet Jackson

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It’s also important to note that not everyone flirts in the same way, and what might be considered flirting in one context might not be in another.

If you have ever wondered if that special someone sees you as just a friend or more, then let’s review some subtle differences shared by others:

The Look:

— Friendly: They give you a quick smile and a nod, like, ‘Hey buddy, what’s up?’
— Flirting: That gaze lingers just a bit too long, eyes twinkle like they’ve got a secret, and that smile? It’s saying more than just hello. It’s like they’re undressing your soul… and maybe a little more.

The Touch:

— Friendly: A casual high-five, a pat on the back, or maybe a quick hug that says, ‘You’re cool, thanks friend.’
— Flirting: Suddenly, every excuse is good enough for a touch. A hand on your arm during conversation, brushing something imaginary off your shoulder. It’s like they’re testing the waters to see if sparks fly.

The Conversation:

— Friendly: Talking about the weather, latest movies, or that funny meme you both saw. Easy, breezy, beautiful… friendship.
— Flirting: The topics get a bit more personal. They’re asking about your love life, dropping playful compliments, and maybe tossing in some cheesy jokes to see how you react.

The Attention:

— Friendly: They listen and share equally. It’s a balanced exchange, like a good game of ping-pong.
— Flirting: They hang onto your every word like you’re reciting the secret to eternal happiness. Responses are quick, engaged, and they remember the little details you mention.

The Text Game:

— Friendly: Messages are straightforward and might take a while to get a response. ‘Hey, did you catch that game last night?’
— Flirting: Responses are prompt, emojis are abundant 😉😍, and late-night texts become a thing. ‘Can’t sleep… was thinking about that joke you told earlier.’

The Compliments:

— Friendly: ‘Nice job on that project!’ or ‘You’re so funny!’
— Flirting: ‘That shirt looks amazing on you.’ or ‘I can’t get over how gorgeous your eyes are.’ See the difference? One appreciates you, the other appreciates you.

The Plans:

— Friendly: ‘Let’s get the group together for dinner sometime.’
— Flirting: ‘How about we grab dinner, just the two of us?’ Ah, the classic one-on-one setup.

The Jealousy Factor:

— Friendly: They couldn’t care less who else you’re hanging out with. More friends, more fun!
— Flirting: Mentioning another potential love interest? Watch their eyebrow twitch or the subtle shift in mood. They might play it cool, but inside they’re like, ‘Challenge accepted.’

The Tease:

— Friendly: Light-hearted jokes and playful banter, all in good fun.
— Flirting: The teasing has a flirty edge. ‘Oh, so you think you can beat me at pool? I’d like to see you try.’ Challenge accepted, and sparks fly.

The Gut Feeling:

— Friendly: You feel comfortable, relaxed, and at ease.
— Flirting: There’s that little flutter in your stomach, a bit of excitement, and maybe you’re overanalyzing every interaction afterwards. If you’re asking yourself, ‘Was that flirting?’, chances are, it was.

At the end of the day, context is key, and everyone has their own style.

But trust your instincts and don’t be afraid to ask or make a move if you’re feeling the vibe.